Entries this day: 51 Dream1 Dream2

51

##11:34 Monday 28 November 2005

Below (save for the AP quote) was written by Serena, serene@riseup.net

RAFAH TERMINAL, Gaza Strip - It was a smooth debut Saturday for the first Palestinian-run border crossing. Hundreds of travelers zipped through passport control without having to submit to Israeli security checks, savoring their new freedom after 38 years of military occupation.

  (Written [27 November 2005 By Ibrahim Barzak,  Associated Press](https://www.google.com/custom?domains=robnugen.com&q=%22Palestinian-run+border+crossing.+Hundreds+of+travelers%22&sa=Search&sitesearch=&client=pub-8968158139273573&forid=1&channel=5817411192&ie=ISO-8859-1&oe=ISO-8859-1&cof=GALT%3A%23008000%3BGL%3A1%3BDIV%3A%23336699%3BVLC%3A663399%3BAH%3Acenter%3BBGC%3AFFFFFF%3BLBGC%3A336699%3BALC%3A0000FF%3BLC%3A0000FF%3BT%3A000000%3BGFNT%3A0000FF%3BGIMP%3A0000FF%3BFORID%3A1%3B&hl=en))

Reading the headline news on Rafah Crossing one would conclude that Palestinians are free to come and go as they please with minimal control by Israel over Gaza in general, nothing significantly impeding them from creating a prosperous economy, controlling their borders, air space and sea ports. The AP news wire with such titles as "Palestinians zip across border" and "Speedy passage from Gaza" conjure up images of anyone being able to leave Gaza as they please, with a snap of their fingers.

At the ceremony held at the crossing last Friday, Nov. 25th, Abbas stated "I think every Palestinian now has his passport ready in his pocket; let them come to cross at this terminal whenever they want,". Despite the opening of the crossing and the majority of control being handed over to the PA, Egypt and the EU, stating that Rafah crossing is open for all to come and go freely is misleading.

Talking to people in Rafah I get the impression that the feeling on the street is not necessarily reflected in the statements of Abbas and other officials. "Sure I can cross" they tell me, "If I had a visa". Men between the ages of 15-55 cannot cross without one. Or I hear "If I had a passport I could pass". Men over the age of 55 must have this ID to legitimize their passage. Not only is the bureaucracy to obtain these documents astounding, taking anywhere from 2 weeks to 3 months, but it costs more money then most people here can afford to fork over.

Abu K has been talking for weeks now about finally being able to visit his parents in Egypt, he has not seen them since the Intifada broke out. We have gone with him, visiting various governmental offices and a lawyer as he attempts to renew his ID card. This process is slow, weighted down with bureaucracy. It could take him up to 3 months before he gets approval. At the same time he has been hoping that his parents would be able to come visit him in Rafah with the opening of the crossing. He kept saying, "I will see my parents soon Insha'allah". As the crossing officially opened he learned that his parents will have to obtain passports, beyond the ID they already hold. This process as well can take up to 3 months. His hopes of seeing them, like those of so many others rose with the hype of Rafah crossing opening. Time and time again the rhetoric does not materialize, the reality of everyday life does not change.

Another friend, Ahmed, has t-shirts of Rachel Corrie and Tom Hurndall that need to be mailed to the states. Mailing anything in and out of Gaza is extremely unreliable, exemplifying the occupation of Gaza in its current form. Ahmed is my age, 24, meaning he needs a visa issued by the PA before being able to cross in to Egypt. Again visas not only take months to process, particularly now as hundreds of people are applying for them, they are also extremely expensive, limiting access even more so to those who's income is above average, or those who patiently save enough to buy their way through. Ahmed's strategy is to send his father who is over 55, thus not needing a visa, merely a valid passport, to mail them from Egypt.

We attended the private ceremony of the opening of the crossing. Being that we are here in Rafah we decided to see if it was all that it was cracked up to be. As we drove toward the crossing the road was lined with Palestinian security guards, after all it was a ceremony for government officials, foreign dignitaries and politicians. When we arrived at the first gate there was no shortage of people crowded outside trying to enter. Those with press passes were allowed to pass through freely, as were the fancy cars carrying men in suits, businessmen, and politicians. We pushed our way through the crowd Rochelle and I and two Palestinian friends, Ahmed and Mahmoud. Standing in the midst of the crowd we waited not knowing what was happening. Mahmoud called to us and the next thing we knew security guards were ushering us through the gate. On the inside of the gate Palestinian police and military personnel dressed in blue fatigue swarmed the area. We began walking and were quickly escorted into a van with other journalists. Wondering how we made it in passed all the security I had the suspicion that being two white women carrying video equipment may have had something to do with it. Mahmoud later confirmed this was true. He told the security guards that he was escorting two journalists. This gave us a good laugh, but also clearly exemplified the power we hold as Americans here. Had Mahmoud and Ahmed attempted to come to the ceremony alone they would still be waiting outside the gate. Staring through the barbed wire fence while those who represent them pass by without a glance in the direction of the people they speak for.

Just entering this ceremony the division between the people and the politicians was starkly clear. Hearing Abbas tell the 1,500 guests "Now every one of you can submit your passport and cross freely with no limitations," I thought, yeah, everyone here at the ceremony can do that, what about those watching from the other side of the barbed wire fence surrounding us, isolating the people from those representing them on the world stage.

I never held the illusion that the Palestinian Authority represented completely the will and voice of the Palestinian people, just as I know the American government does not represent the will and voice of the American people. What I witnessed there solidified in my mind the kind of lives politician lead, shuttled from one place to another, constantly surrounded by armed guards, isolated from society. It makes it difficult to see how they could ever fully know the peoples needs or understand their dreams and hopes for the future enough to implement changes that will benefit the people who know suffering they can only imagine.

I realize this is harsh. People may disagree but what I experienced at this media stunt, men in suits surrounded by international media, Palestinian and Egyptian politicians thanking Condoleezza Rice, thanking Israel. The Egyptian Intelligence Minister Omar Suleiman, and the European Union special envoy to the Middle East peace process, Mark Otte calling this a new era and Abu Mazen (Mahmoud Abbas) summing it all up as a historic day left me feeling empty. The hollowness of their words we have all heard before, watched it on TV. This was simply first time I heard it standing on a red carpet filming Abu Mazen while Palestinians who live on this border, who’s flesh and blood know the pain and fear of this military occupation are made to stand outside this ceremony and listen while others portray their life’s through political rhetoric. I believe equality and peace will not be borne out of this hierarchical power structure by which we live. Peace requires the creativity of us all to dream up a system of equality and sustainability, for the benefit of everyone, not simply a few.

I recognize the limited ability the PA has to make positive change. I understand the pressure from the US and Israel, the demands they make in return for any concessions to the PA. This is not a black and white situation, I am just beginning to understand the complexity of it all. Day by day I gain insight into the intricacies of internal Palestinian politics.

We spent Saturday interviewing adults and children asking them to talk about their lives under occupation, their thoughts on the disengagement, their hopes and dreams for the future, etc. They shared with us the pain and suffering they have experienced and still experience. As I sat, listening and watching I could see so clearly the trauma everyone here lives with. Their voices were strong but watching their eyes and their shaking hands I knew they were re-living experiences I could never understand and things they can never forget.

As I sit here thinking of all the dignitaries and politicians fenced off from the community around them, deciding the fate of millions of people, thinking about the stories I have heard of explosions in the night, the constant gunfire, refusing to leave ones home despite the danger of staying I can't help but feel they are two different worlds. I can't help but wonder if we, ordinary people, took our fate into our own hands, beyond the control of governments what we would create. Surely, having experienced the horrors of war, the pain life brings, we would come together and find someway more successful then all the peace processes, accords and summits held to "win the peace" as Bush so elegantly puts it. Being here, getting to know people, hearing their stories and sharing them with you all I feel a part of this process of change, this resistance, and knowing this is taking place all over the world I can still find faith in humanity despite the atrocities we are capable of committing.

Dream1

am JST Monday 28 November 2005

In a really difficult class with one of my favorite teachers and he was telling us we would have a list of questions on five differnet topics, and the answeres to these questions would give ourselves some insight as to what kind of people we are.

I wrote down the topics on the top of each page in my book and was ready to write down the questions, and then the lecture was finally over (I thought) as he was like, "okay, I'll give you the questions now," and I thought he would give us a URL of each list of questions but he instead was giving us topics of some really far out things like, "american chronyism" and "seahorses" and "topical cream ointments" and "dna structure in history" and "latest football scores" and I got shut down as I interrupted his flow at one point, asking him how these were related or something. Then as he would write each one down, he stood in front of the board so I couldn't see it, so I moved my desk, and he goes, "wanting to make a fuss, but not willing to do extra credit?" and I was on the verge of tears (for a reason I didn't understand) and I was like, "I thought we were going to get a list of questions on a topic, but we are getting a lits of unrelted topics. We could just write down any old topics and get an even better guage of what's in our subconsious than having us respond to what's in your subconsious. If we just have a list of five broad topics," and I flipped through my book to find the ones I had written, but couldn't find them (*) "then that would make sense, but as it is, we are getting exactly the wrong amount of input; broad topics and specific topics under them that don't make any sense to anyone but you so they won't show any insight on ourselves, which was the point of the whole exercise."

He considered this point for a moment and I woke up.

(*) this should have triggered me to realize I was in a dream

Dream2

7:55am JST Monday 28 November 2005

Waking up in a hotel with Hitomi I was like distraught at being so late and she woke up (actually it was Wende) and she called her firend to see if she could leave right away, but she came with me as I drove to school.

As we were still in bed, I was like, "where are we?" cause I couldn't remember where we had gone to sleep the previous night and she goes, "by a road" or something that reminded me and then I was driving myself to school and she came with me (acually it was Hitomi) and I was thinking I'll just have to drive her back and we were on this rather wide street with only one other car, and we were debating between circulating on the left versus circulating on the right and we chose the right after I realized we were in the United States and I drove past the guard booth and the guy was like hey wait a minute but I just rolled through and then got to a big dead end where I normally drove into the school. And I dropped off my mom; I was I was like, "quick; get out before they see you" and she hesitated a bit and I repeated "get out and go into the building" and she got out and they stopped her, but I did a U turn loop around and was like, "will my mom be able to go in?" and they said "Yes." "Will I be able to go in?" and there was no answer.

"Can anyone tell me where I need to go?"

"You can't go inside this way."

And I drove around to the next person. "Honestly. where should I go?" and he said with as much sympathy as didn't make sense, "you won't be able to get in within ten minutes."

and I was like, "where should I go in 9 minutes, then? or 11 minutes?"

"What kind of school is this if I can't get in?" And I just turned around and started crying, driving back and woke up.