Entries this day: -may-96

may 96

8:06am Thursday 30 May 1996

See, all the stories of cool innovative things I've heard (like last night, I met Mandy, from London, who has been for years fascinated with textiles and cloth. She kept buying cloth pieces until she had trunks full. She didn't know why she had it, until she started creating hanging cloth art, that could be arguably described as quilted, but is definitely unique and intriging. She is beginning to sell her work, and loves what she does!) that people do to make cash have all started with them breaking away from the norm and just doing what they love with all their heart and then developing it into something where they can make money at it.

Where is my thing? What do I love to do so much that I can just do and create and continue until I can make a living on it?

My life currently is a big mishmash of stuff that I'm doing in all variety of different types of things like working with youth at church, doing email, skating, playing frisbee.... But none of them are something I LOVE.. Arg. What I want to do is make money while helping the rainforest. Once I'm out of debt, I'll help with the rainforest free; just give me a place to sleep and something to eat and I'm happy. Maybe I can volunteer for now. I just need to call them up....

Okay! I called Christine, a friend of mine who used to work for the Earth Foundation. I'm going over to her house and we'll figure out all the details of how I can work for them. Thank you!

(that was all written to someone named Karen)

I know I was ontrack last night. Christine called me just as I was going to leave and said "gimme 30 more minutes." No problem. 5 minutes before I was going to leave, Danielle Jensen came in, "Rob???" Turns out she had just told Soren she wanted a divorce. Shit.

I called Christine, "I'm going to be a bit late."

Talked with Danielle for a bit and told her all about my SLA recovery and that it's not all superfantastic fucking all over the place. I told her how many hearts I had broken, and about the abortion I had to pay for, and about being pissed at myself for fucking one more each time I did. I told her about the dichotomy of passionate making out with Donatella, opposed to fucking Kris the next day or so and how I had had so much more respect for Donatella than I did for Kris.. I should have mentioned that I'm still in touch with Donatella, but not with Kris. So I told her all this shit about how it sucks to fuck around and that I couldn't make her not do it, but that it was not great fun all the time.

I suggested that she not go run back home, "Soren, I'm cured!"; she still needs her freedom. I gave her big hugs and tried to make sure I kept from kissing her too much. We never kissed on the lips and I feel like I was successful in keeping my bottom-line behavior from happening. I really wanted to make out with her. Happily, I didn't want to fuck her.

Went to Christine's and told her all about what's going on with me and she didn't tell me about her stuff since I didn't want to hear about how great she's doing with that guy. (How could I have forgotten his name just now?) Christine didn't mother me, and I only asked for one cookie, and I left when she requested verbally and we were pretty aware of what all was going on between us. Nothing sexual except a few swats on the ass (not spanking) and I again believe I did no bottom line behavior.

--------------------------------------------------------

96/05/30 08:04:06 st1m5

Here we are and I'm almost not quite late for work.

96/05/30 08:06:56 st1m5

I just figured out a cool way to get individual timestamps in here. I made a file called timestamp which I can reset the time in and then just copy it over here. It only works up to the first 8 lines, and it would change all the time stamps in the file, but I want them unique, but accurate..

7:32pm Thursday 30 May 1996

Got it!!

permalink
prev day next day